As I start reviewing my July 2010 mission trip to Jacmel, Haiti with Forward Edge International, I am going to be relying primarily on the journal I kept during the trip. Journal quotes will be in regular font, editorial comments in italics. Or maybe I'll come up with some other system if that works better!
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July 9, 2010
5:15am Pacific
Pasco Airport
Through security and waiting to board the airplane. I am pretty tired - got up at 4am. I am glad that Eric told me to get up early to take a shower. It is nice to be clean if I am going to be so tired.
Not super nervous at this point. I have been enormously sad the last two days about leaving Eric and the kids. Only part of it is fatalistic "What if I don't come back?" There is another, bigger sadness that I am surrendering the kids, or failing to take care of them. The last time I felt this deep sadness was when I had post-partum depression after Little Man was born and would randomly get sad and cry at the same time every day. Anyway, for more than 4 years my identity has been "mom" pretty much exclusively. It is very weird and scary to be doing this other thing now. Even though I'll only be gone a week, mentally this is like stepping off of a ledge into a different life. No idea what to expect.
I am really glad the kids are small enough that they didn't realize how sad I was yesterday. Sister did a little bit, but in the end the selfishness of being 4 years old won out. Little Man is only thinking about trains, bars, snacks and cars... as usual.
It is really strange to be living in the world without my wedding ring on. [We were told to leave all jewelry and valuables at home because of the risk of burglary/theft.] I keep going to fidget with it and realize it's gone. I have a moment of "Oh crap! I lost my ring!" before I remember I left it home on purpose.
It sounds like we are boarding!
July 9, 2010
8am Pacific
Flying to Denver
Boarding was quick and easy. Cramped. As usual, the person in front of me had his seat as far back as possible but wasn't sleeping. Flying pet peeve.
I had a brief moment of "What if we crash?" anxiety when we first took off, but really minimal. A product of not flying very often, I guess. I snoozed on and off [Very rare while I am travelling] and read some more of Mrs Kimble.
I just realized that I forgot to write down the emergency numbers for Forward Edge and the State Department. What a moron! I'll get them from Eric later. [I had left Eric a lengthy note with contact information for every possible agency related to my trip, as well as the login names and passwords for important accounts and my email, my social security card, birth certificate, copy of my passport, etc. but forgot to bring a copy of the phone numbers for myself.]
I am meeting Mark and Sharon [Eric's parents] at the airport for an hour or so. I'll have to go through security again. At home, they searched my backpack because of my powdered Gatorade. Hopefully the security here will let me keep it. [Powdered Gatorade was on our supply list to be used for flavoring our water and also for electrolytes in case of diahrea. I ended up bringing a cannister of powdered Gatorade which apparently looked like a stack of CD's when they scanned my carry-on bag. Since they couldn't see through the Gatorade, they ended up basically emptying my carry-on bag to go through the entire thing. They thought they were looking for CD's so actually passed up the Gatorade at first before realizing they had found the ominous item. It was a 10 minute search process that I found completely ridiculous. In Denver when I went through security, I "declared" my Gatorade along with my ziplock of liquid items and it passed through without anyone batting an eyelash. It's good to know the security check people at our little, local airport are on their toes!]
I just accidentally penned my pants! Suck! I only have two pairs, so now I'll have to spend the next 10 days looking at that stupid pen mark!
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To be continued...
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